I remember my first overly empathetic moment. I was sitting on top of monkey bars. You know back in the days when you could sit on top of metal objects and not get in trouble? Anyway. A flock of birds flew by and they were in their typical V formation. But, the V was not even. The right side was slightly longer than the left. I took this to mean that one of the birds in the V family had died. I started getting very upset and began to cry because I could imagine how the other birds looked at that empty spot and would remember their friend. I started feeling so bad for them that I got down from the bars and wept to my teacher who probably thought I was crazy.
Lets get to the bugs. When I see a bug I have to kill it within the first 2 seconds I see it. If I don't, I start to feel for the bug. I think about the bugs family, I think about how all the little bugs children are waiting for them to come home. It's hard times everywhere and the little bug is just out trying to make a living.
Think about the shit job that an ant has. It just has to waddle around, following the chemical scent of the ant in front of it so it can find a tiny morsel of food. When it finds the food, it doesn't even get to eat it. He has to carry it, on his back, all the way back to the nest where some fatass queen gobbles it down. He's sent back out to repeat the process over and over. The little ant's wife and kids are probably sitting back at home in their house-pocket, scraping by on what he can salvage from a hard days work. If I kill him, mom gets the stigma of an ant-widow and the kids will grow up to be little piss-ants and snort dirt.
Today, I was in my shower and noticed a spider on the wall. It was starting to get wet from the shower spray. I watched it try to climb the wall to escape the impeding doom. I realized it wasn't going to make it before a huge water droplet had formed on its body and it would drown. Drowning is a painful and terrible way to die. So I dried my hand off and carried it over to the top ledge of the shower door where it would be safe and dry. I doubt he's grateful for my kindness but at least I know my shower didn't disrupt his life.
Also today, I was transferring clothes from my washer to my dryer. I was about to close the lid when this little tiny fruit fly flew in to the washer bin. My first thought was to shut the door and forget about it. Then, I remembered I wasn't going to do another load until Wednesday. The fly would be trapped inside for 2 days. It would have no food or water and would be stuck in the dark. That is a terrible way to die. Maybe it had a wife, who was waiting at their little fly home. He was supposed to just run out and grab some dinner. She had had a hard day and was pregnant with 500 kids. She was having a craving for decayed apple. Her husband was trying to be a good man and go get it for her. But instead, he got lost and thought the inside of the washer smelled like fruit. Poor little guy. I put down my laundry basket and whisked the fly out of the washer and then shut the door.
Maybe my kindness will be repaid later so when I get reincarnated I won't end up a slug or a dung beetle.
PS. There are two exceptions to my bug rule. One is roaches and the other is mosquitos. Those little jerks die instantly. If I could kill them slow and painfully, I think I'd probably do so.
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