Getting over it

While my husband is out of town (yes again) this week, my mom has come in to lend a helping hand. I'm very appreciative of it because the wear and tear of trying to be a single mom to twins is starting to get to me. She's helping out a lot but as expected, my mom is driving me up the wall too.

My mom is that grand-mom. At the park she has to let everyone know how fantastic her grandchildren are. A woman walked in and sat her child down on the ground. My mom asked with complete enthusiasm, "How old is she! My grandbabies are 15 months!" The woman hesitated and said "13 and a half months, she's a little behind developmentally because she refuses to walk." For her to make such a statement like that she is obviously very insecure about the whole thing. My mom said, "oh don't worry, she'll walk when she wants to, she just doesn't want to yet!!" [if you can't tell by all the exclamation points, my mother is a very hyper person]. The lady just said, "ya, I know." and shortly left the park after her daughter started crying.

My mom talks through the babies [my biggest pet peeve if you didn't know]. "But mom, I want more snacks, gimme more snacks please!!" She also has to call herself "grandma" in front of everyone. "Ok, guys, GRANDMA is gonna pay for groceries now!" It's like she's announcing to the world that these are her grandchildren and not her children (my mom is very young looking too so who knows the psychoanalysis on that one). She is also one of the loudest people I've ever met. I am a quiet person by nature and ask anyone I have lived with, you would never even know I was there. She's got cell phones going, music blasting, and talk talk talk talk talk.

But for all the things she's doing that annoy the ever living crap out of me, I'm getting to know some things that I never knew before. You see, my mom was married to a guy for a little bit and then hatched me. I've never met him, know nothing about him, all I know is that he was good at math and I can do derivatives in my head or figure out the square root of ungodly numbers. Other than that, it has remained a mystery because she just has never really talked about it.

I do know he ended up being a very bad man and it involved my potential kidnapping, cops, and a whole bunch of drama, but he is ordered never to contact me...ever. My mom met my now dad when I was only a year old and he came along with his own baby, my now brother. He had some very very awful things happen to him as a newborn that is still not that readily discussed but it ended with my father getting custody of a newborn back in 1980s (a rarity). The two met, married and that is the beginning of history for all I know.

I guess because my dad isn't around for this trip my mom has let me know some details. After the drama and before she met my now dad, she was working 12 hour days just to try and put food on our table and pay rent. My grandmother had to watch me during the day and my mom got to spend only about 30 minutes with me before I fell asleep for the night. It was just me and her from almost the time I was born until she met my dad.

I can't imagine the stress of doing it alone each night every night. But she did. She tells me all the time that I was such a good baby it really wasn't that hard, but I think that is to try and make me feel better. Being on my own so much when my husband travels, makes me appreciate my mom so much more than I ever did. So, even though she is doing many items on my, please don't-list, I'm seeing her in a new light and thankful I have her to help me this week, just like she had her mom when she needed her the most.