A neighbor stopped by to introduce herself today. People do that in Texas, not so much Miami. She introduced herself as Dixie (people are also called Dixie in Texas, and maybe Alabama). She said she was a mother to 28 year old boy/girl twins. She said she had heard from the neighborhood gossip, named Ann, that I also had boy/girl twins. Then she warned me to stay away from Ann, because she, well, was a neighborhood gossip.
She offered her help in any form or fashion. If my husband is working late or out of town, she'll help me put them to bed. If she needs me to watch them while I run to the grocery store, she'd be more than welcomed.
She seemed so nice until her crazy side started to seep through her pancake foundation. She told me that she knew how hard it was to raise twins. Her husband was gone on business all the time because he didn't like having to raise babies. He hated it in fact and would avoid home at all cost. Her mother in law was a bitch and told her everything she did was wrong. She was all alone raising the kids and damn it if she didn't do a good job.
Her speech started to sound like a holy rollin' sermon, complete with hand and arm movements. I explained that I would love some help sometimes but my daughter is a tad bit afraid of strangers (scared shitless). She said that that was my fault for not exposing her more and I need to nip that in the bud right away. I replied with a polite but bitchy, "thanks, I'm working on it".
I listen to her drone on about how awful motherhood was and how if it wasn't for the kids finally moving out of her house she would have divorced her husband. Her son is touring Iraq right now and her only comment was lets hope when he gets back he can get a damn job so he doesn't come back home to me.
It would be nice to have someone stop over and help me put the kids down. But it just doesn't work in practice. Now I know why all my friends who had kids before me never took me up on my offers. I'd offer to put them down or watch them while they go out. I'm sure my friends were dying to take me up on my offer but they probably had kids that were terrified of strangers as well, and would spend the whole night wet faced screaming.
I'm working on letting outsiders into my daughters world. She's been quite hesitant but I can see her fear is waning a bit. At Christmas she let people play with her toys and yesterday she let one of my childhood friends actually pick her up and set her on the slide.
I guess kids do grow out of their issues eventually, but as for Dixie, she seems like she's been holding onto hers for a lifetime.
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